The Garden of The New Year

I spent the last hour of 2010 in silent meditation. The year had been a tough one. John and I had each suffered from serious illnesses that took time and patience to recover from. It had also been a very emotional year for me - a time of looking deeply inward to investigate and come face-to-face with some things that needed to shift and change. So, it was fitting for me last New Year's Eve to end the year in the sweetness of solitude and introspection. In the quiet, waning hours of 2010, I sat in silent meditation and found clarity. In the stillness, I set my intention(s) for 2011. They were simply to love more and to let go.

It's funny, looking back through the days and months of 2011 to see how, as a result of setting these intentions, the universe provided everything I needed and more to manifest them. This doesn't mean that the going was easy. There were times that were downright painful, but each experience brought me a little closer to realizing my vision for the new year.

The "loving more" part of my intention was nurtured easily through connecting more with others, cultivating community, and finding clarity in my practice through time spent with an amazing teacher.  Loving more also had its painful moments when presented with challenging situations that called for cultivating a great deal of compassion - both for myself and for others.

The "letting go" part of my intention arrived slowly, with a lot of introspection, and not at all as I had envisioned, but somehow more beautifully than I could have imagined.  Funny how that happens, isn't it?

The new year is a natural time to think of starting fresh.  I like to think of it as if we've been given a fertile patch of freshly sown earth that's free of weeds, stones, and all the blockages that keep us from living our deepest purpose.  It's there just waiting to provide us with abundance and fullness.  As we unfold into the new year, we cultivate that patch of earth by planting and watering the seeds of our intentions with our awareness, our actions, compassion and mindfulness.  The more we water and nurture our garden, the more we can reap the rewards of its bounty.

Wishing you a fertile and bountiful new year.  

Until next time...

To Students and Friends

Paramhansa Yogananda, Inner Culture, January 1937

The New Year has come to greet you with new hopes, new determination, new will-to-achieve, new activities. In the Temple of the New Year renew your reverence for the unlimited hidden power of God within you. The trails of trials and the yawning chasms of woe have been left behind in the dark night of the past–now you are entering the daylight of a new-born hope of the New Year. Cast off the coil of the decayed thoughts of the past years; be reincarnated into vital living of the New Year.

Every regret for shattered hopes of success must be transformed into the joy of new achievements during the New Year. Old sorrows and disappointments must be buried beneath the sepulcher of the past year. Those dark bandits of discouragement must not remain any longer to steal the wealth of your desire to succeed.

Every day in the New Year must become an altar for the God of new living, new achievements in wisdom, and new joy. Every day in the New Year must bring hope and cheer to yourself and all humanity.

Take all the salvaged treasures of good experiences from the sea of past experience and use them to buy new accomplishments in the New Year. In the garden of the New Year culture the seeds of well-planned new activities until they grow into fragrant flowering plants of diverse successes. Let every day in the New Year become a step upward on the ladder of your Self-Realization. Make every day of the New Year a better day than the previous one for greater effort to succeed in business, family happiness, and increasing the ever-new joy-contact of God in meditation. The old year has gone, but the New Year is full of treasures for you to use.

Bury the bad habit of failure in the tomb of the old year and reincarnate your life energy in the vitality of the New Year. May the New Year spread the example and message of your renewed life and renewed power unto all Creation.

365 Journal Project: The Beginning

So, this past New Year's Eve, in the quiet closing hours of 2010, I sat in silence and for a long while reflected back on the year that had past.  It was a challenging year on many fronts to be sure; at times scary, tiring, and soul searching.  But it was also a year of love, light, prosperity, amazing personal growth, change and clarity (talk about Yin and Yang!).

2010 started out with uncertainty.  Someone I love more than anything suffered from complete mental exhaustion and mental breakdown.  I don't know if you've ever experienced such a thing, but all I can say is that other than the loss of my parents, it was perhaps one of the saddest, scariest and most challenging things I have ever come up against.  The months that followed consisted of a slow process of healing, rebuilding and awakening to a new way of life (an ongoing process we are told).  Much has changed as a result-in the best of ways-and out of the darkness of those first few months came incredible, transformation and light (in yoga we call this "tapas", the burning away of impurities, baby!)  I am truly thankful for it.  

Just as things were beginning to settle down, I had a major health crisis that took the wind out of my sails physically, mentally and spiritually.  With the help of John (my wonderful husband), my friends and an amazing Ayurvedic practitioner (Vishnu rocks!), my condition stabilized.  Thanks to my yoga practice I am strengthening my body and getting my stamina back.  It's been a slow, humbling process, but I'm feeling better and stronger every day.  Because of my meditation practice I have refreshed my mind and renewed my spirit.  Taking the time to sit and meditate each day will change your life!

What really astounded me was watching how the support of my meditation and yoga practices continued on without pause.  Even during the most difficult moments, even during the times when it felt as though I were getting kicked while I was down, the inner stillness was felt with profound clarity.  Daily practice kept me afloat and present with what was happening. Yoga and meditation saves me everyday and enriches my life in more ways than I can possibly articulate.  This isn't to say that I didn't have my moments of despair or self-pity, I'm human!  But daily practice allowed me to see and observe that those not-so-nice thoughts were impermanent.

When I started to get back on my feet towards the end of autumn, a little light started to flicker in me and grow brighter and brighter. In my life "B.Y." (Before Yoga) I worked as an artist and jewelry designer.  From the time I was small I was always creating something: paper dolls with my mother, castles made of cardboard, "cars" for our cats made out of discarded boxes, you name it.  When I got older the medium of collage resonated with me and it took off from there.

The 365 Journal Project is a project born out of my meditations.  I set an intention in my journal on New Year's Eve to work on some sort of artwork everyday.  This is what emerged:

 The next day I found myself pulling out my paper bits, glue, etc and turning the page in the journal for the next entry, and here I am 16 days later and still going!  It is my intention to document a full 365 days of visual mediations.  I don't start out with an idea or theme.  I simply let the images choose me.  I weave them together and when I'm through, the images reveal to me a deeper meaning, a doorway into my inner world, a mirror.

It is my hope to share with you what manifests.

In the meantime, I encourage you to get on your yoga mat and stretch, move, and breathe!  Sit in silence for 5, 10, 15, 20, 30 minutes a day.  Ask questions of your spirit but don't wait for an answer.  Just listen with your heart.

Namaste :)

Love,
k